On The Slippery Slope

It was 6.30am and I woke up to a shrill, insistent squeal; my alarm clock, and a stunning view of endless, icy blue sky and silver fields and trees. Heaving myself upright into a sitting position as I simultaneously switched my pillows from horizontal to vertical, I held out my right hand in readiness for the incoming cup of tea.Heaven.Then the phone rang. I was no longer going to be running about buying rock wool, dumping the old oven, seeing a friend and digging the garden plot. Now, I was dressing smartly and following the 'girly goes to work' routine. Dressed in black and white. Classic, formal and, perhaps, a little severe. That'll do nicely.

School has a 'morning exercise' session and today it was the turn of the tutor group I have been allotted. A walk around the block was on the menu, which, as we're semi rural, and set in the 5 valleys, meant a trek up a steep field. Not a problem, unless you're wearing a pencil skirt, and a very smooth and flat soled  pair of fashion boots. It was almost my Captain Oats  moment as I began to slither, uncontrollably, back down the frost varnished hill.

I'm just sliding backwards, I may be some time. 

Normally a decent sized step would plant me onto secure ground, but in a tight skirt, my chances of salvation were hobbled. No one noticed, they were all sliding about too.

The school day wound its' predictable way to its' end, leaving me suddenly free. I legged it as fast as my skinny skirt would allow.

Off to the Local Council offices to submit the Building Regs form and pay them a fat cheque and to seek help with the planning forms for a small conservatory.It doesn't need planning as it falls outside all the criteria, however it will need a note saying this, issued by the local authority. And, guess what? This note, an Application for a Lawful Development Certificate, will cost us 170 quid. That's 170 pounds for a piece of paper that says, we don't need a piece of paper. Bonkers.I'll finish it, put together the stuff to go with it; you know, plans, map and a cheque and hand it in.  In return, We'll get a a scrap of paper that will sit in a dark folder at the back of a cupboard gathering dust. Worth every penny: not.

Have you ever tried fitting 9 rolls of  loft insulation into your car? Me too. Can't be done, can it? I managed to squeeze 6 in without struggling. I had splinters of rock wool all the way down the front of my slender, black skirt. The other 3 will have to be picked up tomorrow on the way to work.They're all paid for,and I don't want to leave them there for too long, just in case the shop flogs them to someone else.

Spotted this gorgeous dwarf Iris in my garden when I got home. I hadn't noticed it at all until today.

That bloody woman who sold us the oven on Ebay, hasn't been in touch with us.  We wonder if  she's sold it to a friend or neighbour since the auction. As it's cash on collection, it's not ours yet. I wish she'd have the grace to at least appraise us of her situation.

Spent the evening on the phone talking to my friend Joyce. Lovely.